Two Men, Two Cows, Two Guns (2009) Short Film Review


Directed by: Paradis Parker
Written by: Paradis Parker
Stars: John Dunsworth (Trailer Park Boys), Levi MacDougall and Christopher Bearne
Producer: Laura MacKenzie
Flying Dish Productions
Rating: NR
Reviewed by: Char Hardin
Horrorphilia: 4 out of 5
Short Film: Horror – Comedy

Two Men
Two Cows
Two Guns

“I think I shot a cow”

It’s a lovely Sunday afternoon and a couple has a visit with social worker, asking the lady of the house some questions, regarding the young boy residing in the home.  The doorbell rings and when the husband answers the door…the story turns into an UDDER moment of chaos and hysteria.

“My gun went off and a cow died”

Standing at the front door, a visitor, who looks like he just had a blood bath, tries to explain, about the dead cow on the man’s deck around back. The social worker is calling for the young boy and then she sees the visitor and HOLY COW I couldn’t hold back any longer…I laughed.

Paradis Parker commented regarding his short-film, “Thought you’d enjoy this award-winning horror/comedy…more comedy than horror.”

It was as if, he thought, that it wouldn’t be received, because, it was more comedy than our usual fanfare of horror. I am happy to burst that bubble. I loved TWO MEN, TWO COWS, TWO GUNS! The husband, Greg Ross (John Dunsworth), when he answers the door, his tone and demeanor show, that he is not happy with the interruption of his day by the uninvited visitor.

“Why do you hate milk?”

The Man at the door (Levi MacDougall) comes across as wee bit of a buffoon. The Man and his wacky analogy regarding “Eskimos” and the dead cow; had me scratching my head at his audacity and wiping the tears of laughter, which flowed from my eyes. His facial expressions and goofy smile reminded me of an old friend, who smiles the same cheesy smile.


Jake (Christopher Bearne) was the cutest little boy. He had one annoying habit. One of my favorite quotes is of Greg catching Jake in action and saying, “I will feed your legs to homosexuals”. The immediate reaction of the habit and look on Jake’s face is too funny.

I can’t urge you enough, if you are able to see this six minute and thirty-seven second film…WATCH IT! I thought it was “Udderly Charming”. Currently making the festival rounds and leaving piles of laughter everywhere it goes.