Caretaker Movie Review

The Caretaker (2010)

Directed By: Bryce Olson (Be My Baby)
Reviewer: Chuck Conry

The Prologue

The Caretaker is a film that was originally suppose to be released in 2008, I’m not sure what the hold up was but it was finally released on DVD on February 23rd of this year (2010) by MTI Video. It features the always good to look at Jennifer Tilly and everyone’s favorite guy from The Breakfast Club Judd Nelson! It also has some other hot chicks to look at as well and it’s a slasher so I gave it a look.



I mean why not right? I usually love slasher films, most the time when they are bad they are still kinda good, so what does one have to lose?..Well besides valuable time..but that’s all!

The Movie
A group of teenage boys out to give their girlfriends a good scare on Homecoming night, which also happens to be Halloween, head to an abandoned house in an out-of-the-way fruit orchard where they uncover the story of a real life urban legend…Got to give someone some credit here for finding a new weapon to become the trademark killing tool of a killer, that’s a hard thing to find ya know?

Right away the teens in this movie make the time honored mistake of getting into all of this trouble because someone decides they want to skip the school dance. Let it be well known kids, never EVER skip a dance..Unless you’re safely in a backseat somewhere in the parking lot, this finding old run down places stuff is for morons!..Like the poor bastards we are forced to watch here.

I mean I’ll be honest, I don’t like any of these characters as far as the kids go, and I despise the character Topher played by Andrew St. John, if that’s acting then kudos to you sir you come off just like the over the top a-hole you are playing. The girl’s aren’t so bad but I’ll admit the character of Chloe is pretty easy on the eyes so if you’re a guy you won’t mind if she’s not an Oscar worthy actress.


Jennifer Tilly is always fun to watch and she’s playing a pretty crazy teacher this time around, also you got Judd Nelson playing one of the girl’s father, he’s just kinda there..Sadly a lot of the movie is just kinda there as there isn’t much in the way of gore at all, which disappointed me because gore can at times save films. Boobies can’t save this one either as we only see one pair..

Don’t look at me that way, some guys (and some girls) really wanna know this sorta stuff!
In a way I guess I’d describe The Caretaker as an early 90’s type slasher that mixes a bit of joking around in with things, kind of in the vain of Dr.Giggles, so if you liked that you should like this, if you didn’t..well not so much.
The Conclusion
So that how I’d sum this up kids, if you like slashers from the early 90’s with jokes and little blood BUT pretty people to look at then this one’s for you. If not, then you may not get too big of a kick from it.
The film does come with a twist that I saw coming, but maybe I’m just good?..Also if you check it out be sure to stay around for after the credits.
The Rating (4/10)